Add Drop Period Means Paper Craziness!

This is the neater part of my desk. The other side looks worse and my piles have now officially become piles!

Why Asshole Should Come With More Examples In the Dictionary.

Someone on Yahoo answers posted a very simple question regarding RockBand 2 and how to save people using the drums. Makes sense, why read the manual when you can just ask online? Or maybe you don't have the manual. Perhaps the print is too small for your eyes! Anywho regardless of your reasons for asking, why would someone answer:

Um.....i have NO idea what you're talking about....?

And his source be:

OHH!!! It's a GAME! Like Guitar Hero? That's why i have no clue, I'm a REAL guitarist, played shows , recorded , etc. ...Sorry , i'm not a "Gamer".

My complaints, which may be attributed to my already unsavory disposition, are as follows:

1. Apparently, you're not exactly great with grammar! I hope your guitar playing abilities fare much better! Perhaps you're not a grammarian either!
   
   
2. WHY WOULD YOU EVEN ANSWER?! Look, no one plays these games and then thinks they are a rock legend. It's just for fun. The fact that you take it so seriously is ridiculous! Oh you're a REAL guitarist. Did anyone question your musical ability or need validation of your self perceived awesomeness? Oh no, that's right, someone was looking for help! You however, simply needed to show off how small your cock -- or lack there of -- truly is!

And if you're questioning my intentions, well surely you can include this entire post as simply another example of an asshole.

i am a font jukie.

and i have a cat that is way too curious about the items on my desk.

Ten things I wish I could say to ten different people right now. Go on guess.

One) I find you completely ridiculous and you give in too easily.
Two) I find your smile to be completely infectious and I'm glad you're always able to put me in a good mood.
Three) Sometimes, I find you attractive and the thought of that disturbs me. I don't want to fall into the cliche scenario, but sometimes I can't help it.
Four) You're entirely too good for me and I don't deserve you, but I'm glad you think I'm awesome.
Five) I wish I could make you see what an amazing woman I always thought you were, instead of the shell you've become. You were always my superhero as a kid.
Six) I miss being around you and I wish I could see you more often.
Seven) I wish you'd stop your foolish lying, I'm not seven anymore and I'm pretty good at detecting bullshit.
Eight) You're the most amazing person I've ever met and the only reason I came out alright. That makes me feel a bit guilty, because I know how much you did to make sure I always had a smile on my face. I hope one day I can come close to ever returning the favor.
Nine) You're the goofiest genius I've ever met!
Ten) I have such a hard time explaining why we don't keep in touch anymore and I wonder what you're up to.

9 Things about myself...
One) I l can be selfish, but there's a select few that I'd be completely selfless for.
Two) I have lots of anxiety.
Three) I have tons of goals, but I'm scared I lack the ambition and drive to accomplish them.
Four) Painting and cooking are two things I don't care about failing.
Five) I want to live on a farm for a bit.
Six) Everyone bothers me sometimes at some point.
Seven) I joke about everyone and everything.
Eight) I have a soft spot for awful reality tv.
Nine) I know exactly what it is I want to do with my life, I'm just terrified of actually doing it. There's cyclopes along the journey folks!

8 ways to win my heart...

1. Be able to take a joke.
2. Make me laugh
3. Be extremely silly.
4. Don't agree with me on everything, have a backbone.
5. Get into good conversations with me.
6. Feed me.
7. Challenge me.
8. Get along with my friends

7 things that cross my mind a lot...

One) Graduate School.
Two) Hypothetical Situations
Three) The Stories I want to write
Four) My relationships.
Five) My cat
Six) Random worries
Seven) What am I going to eat.

6 things i do before i fall asleep...

One) go to the bathroom
Two) make sure i have clothes for tomorrow
Three) tell andrew I'm going to sleep
Four) say gnight to my buddies
Five) put up an away message
Six) Check it the alarm is set.

5 people who mean a lot to me...

One) Maria
Two) Ruthy
Three) Andrew
Four) Erica
Five) My parents

4 things im wearing right now...

One) Socks
Two) Pants
Three) Underthings

Four) shirt

3 songs i listen to often at the moment...

One) Gravity- Sara Bareilles
Two) Delicate - Damien Rice
Three) Picked me - A Fine Frenzy

2 things i want to do before i die...

One) Travel the globe
Two) Complete an Iron Man

1 confession
I worry all the time. Every second. Always.

How many people have you completely fallen for?

One

What color underwear are you wearing?

Black

Whats on your mind?
Everything and Anything

Have you done anything bad today?

Nope

Do you watch American Idol?

Nope

Who makes you happy most of the time?

The Drew, My Cat, My Sister and Bro -in Law, and my peeps.

When was the last time you did something illegal?

A while ago

Do you want to see anyone the very minute?

Maybe

Do you have a deep secret?

Everyone does

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Nowhere and everywhere

What was the last text you got, and what did it say?

Something about being in New Brunswick Soon

What are you sick of?

People

What do you want right now?

Go home eat and sleep

Would you use family connections to get a job?

Ha ha ha, my family doesn't have any connections.

Are you desperate?
Nope

Have you ever made anyone cry?

Yes I have.

Have you ever gotten stabbed in the back by a friend?

No, I've gotten tossed aside and treated as if the last 10 years meant nothing though. That's even worse.

Do you believe in god?

Not at all. Imaginary men cause problems when they are placed on a pedestal by bad meaning men.

Are you normally a happy person?

Yep

What makes you mad?
It'd be a shorter list if you asked what didn't anger me.

What is you're greatest fear?

Fear itself.

Do you like people?
Some people.

Are you annoying to people?

People annoy me, so I'm sure I annoy them.

What would you do if you walked in on your GF/BF with another person?

I have no idea.

What religion annoys you the most?

Actually no religion annoys me. It's when people abuse religion and turn it into something disgusting that I become annoyed.

If you could have one superpower what would it be?

Telepathy or Teleportation.

Who is the last person you hugged?

The Drew

If you could go back 3 years and change something what would it be?

I wouldn't change anything, I am who I am because of what I've done.

What's your favorite thing to talk about?

everything.

Would you sleep with someone for a million dollars?

It depends on who....ha ha ha

Would you kill someone for a million dollars?

Nope

Fuck you Eagles! Ha ha ha! I'm not actually angry. My team didn't get slaughtered like the last team the Eagles played. I'm disappointed that they didn't bring it, like they should have. So actually, like a decent person does, I have to say, good game to the Eagles. We didn't want it more, they did. Though I hope you lose next week! :).

On a bigger and more important note. I'm infuriated and it has nothing to do with the game. Which is why I wanted to get my spiel about the game out before I started saying I was pissed. Because I'm not pissed about the game. I'm just upset over it.

I think part of me is angrier that I bit my tongue for so long and didn't get what I've been wanting to say out for the longest time and the other part of me is angry for knowing that I was wasting my time and constantly hearing about how I'm wasting my time, but still choosing to do so. I can only be angry at myself for that.

But for the record. Dealing with a friend doesn't include the times you chose to hang out with them. That's part of being a friend. Dealing with a friend isn't even proof-reading their papers or listening to them babble on about nonsense. That all comes with the territory of being a friend. Friends do things like that for each other. It's the whole reciprocity aspect of being a friend. You scartch my back, I scratch yours and an alliance forms. Dealing with someone however, is always trying to explain to them how you feel and in return having that sentiment blown off by a sweeping statement such as "You think too much" or some other ridiculous excuse that you give to try to say that you're not choosing sides. But you've made is so disturbingly obvious that you have that it's sickening. Not to place all the blame on you though. Chances and common sense tell me that I should've known from the first time you decided to pick someone over me that this friendship was not viewed the same on both sides. It should've been a clear sign that at any given moment you would toss me aside for whoever stroked your ego, or made you feel like you fit in.

A good friend of mine always talks about the loyalty. It irks me. I think it's always been more the word, than the concept. Some words just strike me the wrong way, loyalty has always been one of them. It feels out dated, it sounds as if we are pledging some allegiance to a king or fellowship or something. But the concept, the idea of fidelity, the idea that you're not going to toss the other person aside like an old toy because a newer and shinier one came along, is what she always spoke about.

You think it's merely about disappearing. But it's never simply about that. I have friends disappear on me all the time. Disappearing isn't hanging out with the same group of people and choosing not to acknowledge another. It's not something you just pull up to cover your tracks, when your tracks aren't so easily coverable.

In addition, if you no longer chose to partake in my company, simply come forth and say so. It's better than the bullshit job you're doing of trying to act as if you're so busy. Honesty, regardless of how heartbreaking it may or may not be, is always better. If you don't like who I am anymore, if you find some fault with me then just say so. I've obviously found enough flaws in you to make me even question the reasoning behind my wanting to maintain your friendship. It's the runaround that irritates me the most. Why not just come out and say it, I don't like your company anymore. I don't want to be your friend. You irritate me. It would have saved so much more time. Efficiency people...JEEZ!

Reflections...

I really need to do something about the space I'm taking up here on the interwebs. I always say I'll do something about my blog to make it more....readable, but I never do. I think that I might actually have to at some point. I guess I'll have to add it to my list of 2009 Goals. I mean have you people read this thing? Jesus, talk about sucktastic. I should change the name!! And I should really blog abotu things that interest me more rather than just what I'm up to. I mean by all means, if you care about what I'm up to. I'll insert a random thing here or there...but I should change pace. A new year should mean new things right? At least for the first two weeks of January!

Being old news is the best news! :).

Feels like Sunday.

I said I wasn't going to pay attention to this football game...and here I am, listening to this football game. I really really need to stop. Cause I'll get a little TOO into it! Oh man and this interception, just pulled me even further into the game.

Highlights of Conversation today:

me: i say go dallas

ruthy: haha

me: i mean best team ever right?

ruthy: hahaha

me: they're america's team and america's the best place ever

me: and that means they are the best team ever

me: look, i only like the giants because i'm a fan of mediocrity

me: i can't appreciate greatness

ruthy: I root for the home team

me: exactly

me: that's why you're a jets fan

me: ha ha ha ha

ruthy: lol

me: look everyone's home is texas

me: texas is the heart of america

me: when you think of america you should think of texas

me: it's as american as like hamburgers and tacos
me: don't believe the hype that dallas is a mediocre team with a massive marketing engine


Sarcasm was of course the name of the game here people!


I'm an Eagles fan folks, twice a year, the two times they play the Cowboys and today, I'm sure all the hardcore Eagles fans were super ecstatic!! Thanks Eagles, for making this a fantastic Sunday Afternoon! Now, I hope you suck the rest of the post-season! Hee! Hee!

Weird Nighttime Cinema....a Series

I have weird dreams....and luckily, they are so weird that I remember them. Lucky for you that is!!! Because I will recount it for you here! Grab something to eat...something small, maybe just stick a piece of gum in your mouth...it won't be a long tale to tell.

My dream begins with me in bed at my old house. My bedroom is not the orange color it once was, rather all the colors are more subdued and the room is larger than it was. So large, that the bed I'm laying in is king size and there's still room left in the room. In said large bed Andrew, Abe and I because apparently, I had a slumber party or something. At one point, Andrew leaves the bedroom and when he does so, he sees Abe give me a hug or something, something completely innocent. He gets mad at me and when Abe leaves tells me that he's upset because Abe wasn't even wearing a glove. Andrew leaves, but not before telling my mother about what happened. She comes into my room and continues to nag me about how it's not right what I did. I can't have two boys giving me hugs without gloves on. She goes on and on about it, and all I vividly remember, is that I just wanted her to shut up so I could go back to sleep. I remember telling her that it was just a hug, who cares if he was wearing a glove or not. Her nagging was in both English and Greek. Irritating.

Noteworthy Links

These are articles I either encourage people to read...or want to read later on today! So don't stay a while please mosey on over:


Gay Marriage: Our Mutual Joy and if you'd like to embark on the feedback .

Linux Stop Holding Back Our Kids

I'll be adding to this as the week goes on!

Not Everything You Read On The Internet is True....

Domokun got NOTHING on my Charsi....but then again...she is a blacksmithing barbarian!

Jeez,

I haven't blogged in for forever. I'm not sure if I have anything to say. Or if I've even had a chance to sit in my thoughts and write them out. I'll do that soon. I'm trying to figure stuff out, but I feel like I've been stagnant. I need to change the way I am. 2009 will surely be different.

Tiresome Tuesdays.

Some times I don't know what's worse...the glances or the....

....

.....
Aside from the kitty (Charsi by the way) being able to come home with me, and getting the graduation certifications done at work today. Everything else has sort of been well, a mind jumble. I keep thinking over specific situations over and over again in my head. And wonder what the fuck I should be doing about it. Only my thoughts are never really in any particular order. They are always consistently jumbled and eventually become round about in what I wonder is me just trying to give myself answers that seem right. Am I trying to convince myself of some sort of reality that isn't really present, or is it what's really there and I'm complicating more than it needs to be. I've wrestled with this same question for what I feel like has been forever and now I'm beginning to think that my response is no longer of the same caliber that it used to be, but that more than ever I want it to be. Before it was clear as day and now....

And all I want to do is write about it, and just get it out and even then I feel awful about it. Well, I'd never actually blog about it, but I'd never want to journal about it and when I do I can't All the small stories and dialogues I try to pen fail miserably. I can't talk about it because it just makes me feel even worse and it probably comes out worse than anything I try to write.


Blah blah blah, I just don't want to think of it anymore. I don't don't don't. And if I put anyone in an uncomfortable situations I'm sorry about it.

Mysoon to be kitty!

Update:
Charsi is mine! And I will post new pictures as soon as she's home! :) I have to give a big thank you to Heather for finding such a cutie patootie and thinking about Andrew and I. EEP! Too excited!! :)!

This article just blew my mind. BOOM Blown. I'll respond to it in a little bit. Completely infuriated as if I weren't to begin with anyways. UGH! It's 2008 people Two Thousand Fucking Eight, grow the fuck up and leave your backwards fucking beliefs behind!

A few laughs...

Bittersweet.

So Obama won!! Woots are in order, but the road ahead is still going to be a long and hard one. I should be excited, considering that I go into all of these events with the notion that what I want will lose. (Super Bowl, Euro '04, Euro '08 all except the 04 election...and we all know how that ended!!) It's a trick I play for two reasons: 1. I don't want to jinx anything and 2. I'd rather begin the night disappointed and end on a happy note. I was happy last night when Obama won, actually I think at first I was more in disbelief. My brain couldn't comprehend it, like GTFO no way?! But the BBC wouldn't lie right? So now I'm just happy and I'm excited about what's to come from all of this. Is it really going to be change? And how much of a change? I know it won't be immediate, but I'd like to know what direction this will put us in. Excited I guess for the future.

And yet, part of me is still a little disappointed. Where was the youth 4 years ago? You guys all stepped out this time, but you could've ended the Era of Bush II last time. He was going to get out of office regardless of whether you voted this term or not. But you sat on your asses until it was made "cool" to vote and believe that you actually had a voice. IMs, Text messages, Myspace/Facebook Statuses remind me to vote. I've always voted. Don't remind me like I'm some imbecile, because where were you four years ago? Where were you when you could've made another difference? I guess I'm mad that it took kids my age 8 years of Bush to realize how backwards he is, than the first measly 4. So to my generation, thanks, but part of me still feels like it might be a little too late. Let's just hope this isn't a one time thing and you all do get woken up and realize that the youth does have a voice, we've always had a voice, and we definitely have more stamina to make a bigger ruckus!

And I'm also upset because of all the gay bans that passed. Arizona and Florida banned gay marriage, which I sort of expected from them, sadly. (It's sad that I have to expect that!) But Cali?! Really?! Really?! I was kinda hoping Prop 8 wouldn't go through and it'd set some standard for the country or so I thought in my idealistic mind. Completely disheartened. I just don't understand how, it's highly illogical. And maybe that's why I'm so flabbergasted, because this is something that won because those backing it, don't use logic. Oh well, I guess the key is to just keep on fighting.


More on this later, as I always say.

I hate when creativity strikes me at work. This has happened for the third time at work in the last two weeks. I think it's because it's hard to find quiet time at home as of late. Part of me wants to get rid of my desktop, and buy a laptop. Or maybe just buy a laptop. For moments like this, I could've ran away on my lunch break and gone with it.

I've gotten in an unsatiable mood to paint lately. Although I know my paintings will suck, I've gotten ideas. Actually, all I want to do is paint and write. No work, no reading (or trying to read) anthro articles, I just want to hang out, paint, write and make out! Ahahaha! I sound like some kind of bohemian beatnik.

Lately, I've become a different person I've noticed. I've been more relaxed. I let my hair down more, I really don't consider other people's opinions of me. I think that has a lot to do with who I've been surrounding myself with lately. No one starts pointless arguments, I never have to worry about some stupid drama starting up. It's just all about hanging out. I can even be as retarded as I want, and no one cares about a stupid comment here or there. I went from consistently walking on eggshells, to walking on sunshine. (ha ha!) I feel like I finally get to just be me, because no one is concerned with what being me is, they just want me to be? Does that make sense? I hope it does. Hanging out doesn't invovle pretensions or a need to please everyone and make sure they are all ok with you, it's just...hanging out. Some of these people I've only known for a month and I feel completely comfortable around them. I had some friends I've known for years and I never felt the same level of comfort with them. And this isn't to say that these new people are my new bestest friends adn we're all so tight, because that's not how I operate. But I like the ability to just...be myself...even around complete strangers.

I had a lto more to say but I typed out a lot of it to Ruthy. I'll get back to this again when the mood strikes me.

I'm just in a good mood and being in a good mood scares me...it foreshadows a poor afternoon ahead. Let's hope otherwise.