I've gotten in an unsatiable mood to paint lately. Although I know my paintings will suck, I've gotten ideas. Actually, all I want to do is paint and write. No work, no reading (or trying to read) anthro articles, I just want to hang out, paint, write and make out! Ahahaha! I sound like some kind of bohemian beatnik.

Lately, I've become a different person I've noticed. I've been more relaxed. I let my hair down more, I really don't consider other people's opinions of me. I think that has a lot to do with who I've been surrounding myself with lately. No one starts pointless arguments, I never have to worry about some stupid drama starting up. It's just all about hanging out. I can even be as retarded as I want, and no one cares about a stupid comment here or there. I went from consistently walking on eggshells, to walking on sunshine. (ha ha!) I feel like I finally get to just be me, because no one is concerned with what being me is, they just want me to be? Does that make sense? I hope it does. Hanging out doesn't invovle pretensions or a need to please everyone and make sure they are all ok with you, it's just...hanging out. Some of these people I've only known for a month and I feel completely comfortable around them. I had some friends I've known for years and I never felt the same level of comfort with them. And this isn't to say that these new people are my new bestest friends adn we're all so tight, because that's not how I operate. But I like the ability to just...be myself...even around complete strangers.

I had a lto more to say but I typed out a lot of it to Ruthy. I'll get back to this again when the mood strikes me.

I'm just in a good mood and being in a good mood scares me...it foreshadows a poor afternoon ahead. Let's hope otherwise.